DAY 5 UPDATE

Germany easily displayed their dominance over Portugal yesterday. Mueller, who put on a performance defined solely as clutch, placed his Golden Boot bid with authority. Lukas Podolski seems to be having the time of his life--taking selfies with the German Chancellor... while Cristiano Ronaldo was left to his denial, despair, whining and sorrow. Who hits a one-man wall? We also now know that Pepe is an idiot... Did he really have to use his head to get across his argument? Is that a cultural thing, or was he deliberately trying to screw over his nation?
The second game was a dud. Congrats to those who predicted the 0-0 scoreline. Ghoochannejhad did show promise however, and I'll stick by him! Moses and Mikel were just awful; I'm very much second guessing my choice of Nigeria progressing to the 16.
I hope you didn't leave your couch as soon as USA and Ghana kicked off! Dempsey is a beast--first his 30 second marker (the 5th fastest World Cup goal ever), and secondly his resiliency to continue after undoubtedly breaking his nose...

Ghana's mid air karate kick which broke Dempsey's nose https://t.co/A7we4NkynE
— King Mansa Musa (@MarkPerciPerci) June 16, 2014

Gotta give props to the U.S. for holding off a strong Ghanaian squad, who probably should've won that game based on their pressure and possession.

As for our pool, one of the Janke Snake Bros finally broke away from the pack: Joely "Gutter Balls" Janke.

Here are the

DAY 5 RESULTS

Today's matches feature Tin Tin visiting North Africa, a Brazilian-Mexicana fiesta, and some Mother Russia cooking of Kimchi. Enjoy!

Cheers.